You've read about the swingers groups and find there is one in your area and you think you might like to find out more about the clubs or are interested in joining one. While the process listed isn't written in stone most of it or parts of it are used by most clubs to insure club event run smoothly.
The process usually starts with you contacting the club, from the information on the club pages, and letting them know you might be interested in joining their club or recieving more information. Most clubs have some written information about their club, as well as a list of the rules the club operated under. The club information will tell you in more detail what types of events the club sponsors and how often these events happen. The club rules are usually pretty straight forward and common sense, things like don't get stupid drunk, or show up on time, etc. Another pices of information a lot of clubs include is a pamphlet on swingers ediquite. This lets you know how you should treat others and how to expect to be treated. Again we feel this is pretty much common sence, but can be comforting for a new couple, as you'll see there is a pretty established series of steps to follow in expressing or reacting to invations to play.
After you read the information sent to you. You be told to call back if you are still interested. The club will request that you meet with a couple from the club or ask you to attend an orentation meeting. The purpouse of this meeting is NOT to see if you are good looking enough to be allowed to join the club. It has a couple of goals. First is to insure you have read the information sent to you, and that you understand it. One of the things that they will ensure you know is the importance of the simple word no in the lifestyle. No is a very powerfull word, it dosen't mean not right now but not now ever. It means for what ever reason, that the other person or couple isn't interested in you. You should also know that you shouldn't be afaraid of using it if that's what you mean. Not all couples will apeal to you, nor you to them. It's a fact of life and shouldn't be taken personally, it's a fact of life, it dosen't mean you aren't desireable, just means your not what that couple or person is looking for. One other aspect of no you should know is if you mean to tell someone not just now don't say no. The most important aspect of the orentation meeting is for you to ask all of the questions you might have about the swingers group, events, or swinging in general. You will have a lot of questions at this point and don't be embarassed to ask them. You will find that couples in the lifestyle in general, and the couples asked to help with membership are used to answer questions about sex. The idea is to ask all of the questions you need to so that you will feel as comfortable at your first event. There is no way to eliminate all for your feelings of nerviousness about a new experience but by having a lot of the mistery removed from the events can help some. Most clubs only admit couples, and if so you'll both need to go to the orientation meeting as a couple.
If you decide to join the club you'll be asked to sign a club agreement and pay any club fees. It is only after you do all of this that you'll be told the location of the club events, that is unless the orentation is held at the location.
This is just the general outline of the process, and not all parts of it are required of all clubs, some more some less. The thing to keep in mind is all of the process is designed to insure you will feel a comfortable at any events you might like to attend. Also to insure that your privacy and that of other club members is protected. It also insures, since everyone attending has been through the process, that no one at an event will be comming without knowing that the events are for swingers or those curious about the lifestyle.
We hope that this might help eveyone who has asked about the process, like all parts of our site we hope that if you have any questions that you fell free to ask us.
Joe & Mary